Major Issues

What makes a person wonder if they are doing the right tihng or nor if the right thing is the wrong thing or not what makes the choices we make right or wrong if we help or hurt people if we care about people or leave them completely out of our lives.
As a child our parents taught and showed us what was right and wrong like saying thank you and god bless you when someone sneezes, after living for 18 years but only really remebering like forteen of these years i have realized that most people lose these things when they assume some responiblity i for one realize i have lost most of mine one good showing is when i buy something now for my family i always want to hear thank you or i feel cheated of the good thing that i did for one day, that my parents did for years it is getting terrible i do these things at work to show i care like help people when their groceries or help an old lady it is showing i care to my bosses and maybe more money for helping these people when my evaluation comes around but in my body and mind i know i don't give a shit about these people or even my bosses i could care less about them i just do this to valdiate myself for all the disrespect i show everyone who cares for me. When did this happen, it probably startes when kids or in my case get some money and can do whatever they want without their approval and then wehen the parents say no you cuss them out for the first time and storm out or it may resolve from deeper emotional issues like if a signifanct family member dies when is also something that happen to me, but then again it will eventually happen to everyone sometime in their life.
In my case i think this caused many factors to contribute to the way i treat people and see life as is it nothing but a bunch of shit that will wear me down to the point where i will just not care about what happens except just to escape life through drastic means